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The Figurine of Wondrous Power (Ivory Goats) Magic item can produce Giant Goats.

Having recently acquired this item, I was wondering if you could obtain goat milk from the magically produced Giant Goats, provided that said Goats are fed properly.

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    \$\begingroup\$ Dude I have to LOL when I read this question... Just... Really... I mean... LOL \$\endgroup\$ – JP Chapleau Jan 29 '18 at 18:46
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    \$\begingroup\$ question of the year \$\endgroup\$ – eyecosahedron Jan 30 '18 at 22:07
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    \$\begingroup\$ Part of our fine cheese collection. \$\endgroup\$ – nitsua60 May 15 '18 at 18:29
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The weird and RAW answer should be yes, but it's probably not.

Before anything, I must say that I'm genuinely amazed and surprised by your thought process and found your question funny.

A figurine of wondrous power is a statuette of a beast small enough to fit in a pocket. If you use an action to speak the Command Word and throw the figurine to a point on the ground within 60 feet of you, the figurine becomes a living creature.

If it is a living creature it has it's basic life functions and mammals have the capacity to produce milk.

Unfortunately for you, only a portion of mammals can produce milk, that portion are the lactating female representatives of the species. I'll not lecture anyone in biology here, but I believe you know the prerequisites to reach that condition, right?

So, it's impossible?

I never said that. It's just highly unlikely. It becomes a living creature resembling the actual figurine. Then, if the artisan made a lactating female figurine of a goat, you have a lactating female goat and there's your milk.

My goat is a male, then I won't have milk.

Your goat still becomes a living creature with normal (and extraordinary) living functions. You can buy the females and have a breeding program of your own.

But yeah, unfortunately you most likely won't have your safe everyday goat milk in the middle of a dungeon.

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    \$\begingroup\$ @SeriousBri How do you feel about wolf milk? \$\endgroup\$ – Sneftel Jan 26 '18 at 10:48
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    \$\begingroup\$ Surely if the cost to the artist is basically the same, why wouldn't they go for the version that supplies milk too? \$\endgroup\$ – Sobrique Jan 26 '18 at 11:40
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    \$\begingroup\$ This whole question just reminds me of Thor's two giant goats, Tanngrisni and Tanngnjost (Toothgnasher and Toothgrinder), who he could kill for meat each night, and so long as he kept their skins and bones safe, they'd regenerate in the morning. So I mean, there's precedent for magic giant goats that provide theoretically infinite food. \$\endgroup\$ – Darth Pseudonym Jan 26 '18 at 13:08
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    \$\begingroup\$ @Sobrique That line of thought reminds me of a certain munchkin's Dedicated Wright \$\endgroup\$ – Tacroy Jan 26 '18 at 17:07
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Since the rules don't say you can't, then you can: work with your DM.

This is a part of the game that by design intent is supposed to be worked out at your table. In this set of rules, there is a great deal left unspecified1, so the players and the DM can fill in these bits as suits their table.

The principle behind this is called "Rules As Fun(RAF)." Make your case to your DM for why it works, and encourage a favorable ruling.

RAF. Regardless of what’s on the page or what the designers intended, D&D is meant to be fun, and the DM is the ringmaster at each game table. The best DMs shape the game on the fly to bring the most delight to his or her players. Such DMs aim for RAF, “rules as fun.” We expect DMs to depart from the rules when running a particular campaign or when seeking the greatest happiness for a certain group of players.

Yogurt and cheese are good for you, and they are delicious. Just remember the old farmer's adage: if you milk a lady goat, you get some goat's milk. If you milk a male goat, you get a friend for life.

Two other design points: rulings over rules, and from the DMG page 5:

Master of Rules The rules don't account for every possible situation that might arise during a typical D&D session.

From a lore perspective, the three goats seem to be inspired by Norse legend and Thor's two giant goats, Tanngrisni and Tanngnjost. He could kill them for meat each night, and so long as he kept their skins and bones safe, they'd regenerate in the morning: a precedent for magic giant goats that provide theoretically infinite food. (Thanks to @Darth Pseudonym)


1 Whether the goats summoned with those figurines yield milk is not specified in the rules. (DMG p. 169-170).

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    \$\begingroup\$ Despite the other answer having more upvotes, yours teached me so much about RAF and the like that I'm inclined to accept it instead. \$\endgroup\$ – Gael L Jan 26 '18 at 13:37
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    \$\begingroup\$ @GaelL Glad to be of service, the question made me laugh out loud when I read it. It reminded me of some of our funnier old school sessions with things like this... \$\endgroup\$ – KorvinStarmast Jan 26 '18 at 14:06
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    \$\begingroup\$ @KorvinStarmast "if you milk a lady goat, you get some goat's milk. If you milk a male goat, you get a friend for life." This made my day. \$\endgroup\$ – Aguinaldo Silvestre Jan 26 '18 at 15:49
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    \$\begingroup\$ @AguinaldoSilvestre :) happy to serve, even if only as comic relief. :) \$\endgroup\$ – KorvinStarmast Jan 26 '18 at 15:52

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