I'm new to dungeons & dragons and social gaming in general, and I need some guidance on things that are making it not fun for me to play.

I joined a campaign with the guidance that it was a good party, so I made a lawful-good character that follows Lathander. When I started playing with them, I found that one character is a necromancer and is definitely not good. We also had a rogue join that is branded by Lathander but is constantly stealing and murdering people.

What should I do when they murder someone or steal from the party? I know stealing from party members is not being a team player.

It really annoys me when we give them things to identify, and they dispel any awesome magic items related to Lathander that I would have used. Is there a way to punish this?

Furthermore, should I punish the necromancer for raising dead, just to be consistent? They really just use it to help the party out.

This campaign has been going on for a while. The DM said the campaign will probably provide punishment, but they have also looked to the players to punish specific acts like murder. My problem is not knowing when to act and how far to go with it.

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    \$\begingroup\$ Only you can know how you're lawful good character would act in such situations: it's your character. Questions about how a certain aligned character would act are off-topic on this site. If you want to know how to deal with this situation as a person, in the social constructs of your group then we can help with that but we can't tell you how to roleplay your character. \$\endgroup\$ – Purple Monkey Dec 18 '19 at 20:53
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    \$\begingroup\$ Items couldn't be dispelled in 3.5, either. However, in 5E, Dispel Magic really only does what it says on the tin - it affects spells. Properly destroying a magic item takes a lot more effort than a 3rd level spell. If your DM is allowing them to destroy magic items that easily, you need to sit down with him and review the rules. Unfortunately, as a new player, you're fighting an uphill battle. \$\endgroup\$ – T.J.L. Dec 18 '19 at 20:54
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    \$\begingroup\$ No apology is necessary. But I cannot state my agreement with @PurpleMonkey strongly enough-- the question of what YOU, rather than your character, might do in order to address "not fun for you to play," is very much on topic. You may find similar questions (probably under 'problem-players' or 'problem-gm' tags) and if not, a direct question along those lines is very welcome. \$\endgroup\$ – Novak Dec 18 '19 at 21:12
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    \$\begingroup\$ @RachelMartin I'd probably start a new question instead of trying to adjust this one. There are already answers to this one. \$\endgroup\$ – T.J.L. Dec 18 '19 at 21:27
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    \$\begingroup\$ I guess I misunderstood, but now I have my answer. Don't punish the character; talk to the person. \$\endgroup\$ – Rachel Martin Dec 18 '19 at 22:02

Roleplaying, as an activity, is supposed to be fun. If someone is roleplaying in a way that is not fun (either for themselves or for someone else), it generally means that they are doing it wrong and should stop.

You've told us that one of your players is playing a rogue and is stealing from the party. (And I think there's an implication that this isn't fun for you, and might also not be fun for other characters.) Most groups consider this sort of thing to be rude. One solution to this would be to talk about it out of character -- "Hey, I think I'd enjoy this game more if your character wasn't stealing from the party". Sometimes this doesn't work, and then you have to think about whether the game is still fun despite this one character being annoying.

You've asked if your character should punish other characters for doing stuff that your character's god doesn't approve of. The answer is: your character should only do that if it is fun for the whole table. If you can find a way to make a joke out of it, like the necromancer raises a horde of zombies and you say:

My brother, my heart bleeds for you. I will pray for Lathander to have mercy upon your soul. Here is the Holy Scripture of Lathander; please read Chapter Two and meditate on how you can have strayed so far from His Holy Word.

then maybe that's a fun bit of roleplaying which the whole table can enjoy. On the other hand, if you start making melee attacks against him, he's probably not going to like that, so you shouldn't do it.

You might be considering directly attacking other characters in-game, not as roleplaying but as a way to convince the players to stop being annoying. I recommend not doing this. I've seen situations where someone initiates PvP combat, and then the rest of the group gangs up against the person who started it. Even if that doesn't happen, the risk is that you might start a fight and then lose.

One solution to your problem is to have your paladin leave the group and bring in a different character who won't have a moral conflict with the rest of the characters. I've done that a couple of times in the past, and it's never been perfect, but it does remove a lot of in-character tension.

The other solution to your problem is to think about whether you want to remain in the game even though some players are annoying. D&D is a game where you "vote with your feet"; it's not unusual to have to try several groups out before you find one you like.


If you try to punish another players character with your character you're going to run into "My Guy" syndrome. My Guy is when people use their character as an excuse to do things, generally unfun things like kill or steal from other PC's; "I'm not a jerk, my guy is Chaotic Evil, it's what he'd do!".

First Thing:

The first thing you need to do is have a conversation with your fellow players. Tell them that you're finding it hard for your character to have believable reasons to continue on this journey. Then you're going to quickly realize you have limited options.

  • If your fellows agree that you should play your character it seems likely to turn to PvP and you'll (most likely) die in 2v1, or maybe you get them killed via the help of other Lawful and/or Good people (Guards etc)

  • Another option is to continue playing your character, ignoring the role play aspects.

  • The third option is to just retire your character by having them leave and make a new one

  • The last option (that I see) is that your character changes, becomes a fallen Paladin or something of the sort, from having been around these murder hobos for so long.

The conclusion to all inter party conflicts is always talking to your group about what you want, what they want, and what is going to be most fun.

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    \$\begingroup\$ Related: What is “my guy syndrome” and how do I handle it? \$\endgroup\$ – NathanS Dec 19 '19 at 8:50
  • \$\begingroup\$ Please be careful not to overuse the concept of "My Guy syndrome", which is a pathological extreme of a normal and healthy behavior. Making decisions on the basis of what your character would do is roleplaying. If you absolutely refuse to adjust your character to suit the needs of your group, then yes, that's a problem. \$\endgroup\$ – Mark Wells Dec 19 '19 at 20:34

They are playing their character, your should do the same.

If their characters are thieves and murderers then their committing theft and murder is, arguably, just them roleplaying their character.

Your character is lawful good however. What should a lawful good character do when they become aware that someone how stolen or committed murder? Reporting them to the authorities is likely your best course of action. It could be argued that doing so goes against party unity, but their murdering and stealing has the same issue.

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    \$\begingroup\$ This seems like a "don't like what they're doing? Do it back at them!" kind of solution, which doesn't typically work out well and results in antagonistic relationships existing between at best only the characters \$\endgroup\$ – Medix2 Dec 19 '19 at 12:06
  • \$\begingroup\$ I wish I could report them to the authorities, but the entire campaign is in a dungeon. \$\endgroup\$ – Rachel Martin Dec 19 '19 at 19:17

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