Others have pretty well covered the "The DM is a jerk" aspect of this, so I am going to give the alternate answer.
You cannot make him want to stand down, nor should that be your first option.
It's hard to know what this DM has done (if you could edit some details into the question that would be great), but I suspect that most of the problems are because this is their first time DMing.
DMing is hard, sometimes very hard.
If the DM is being controlling, that is likely because he put effort into design a specific scenario or general campaign, and the players are wanting an open world. It can be hard to improvise interesting content if the players depart from your prepared script too significantly. If the DM hands a quest to you in a tavern, it is polite to accept the quest. If you go to another tavern and ask if there is any mercenary work, you had best expect that a suspiciously similar alternative quest will be the only one available.
If you are planning something that will derail the campaign, announce it at the end of a days DnD, not the start. i.e. you slay the bandits and rescue the princess. The DM calls it an end to the session. If you're planning to ransom the princess back instead of freeing her as you were meant to, announce it immediately. If you wait a week and announce that in the opening minute of your next session, the DM will be more likely to railroad you.
If the DM is making fights too hard, then consider this helpful tactic. Don't name your character. The tragic death of Sir Loucious the 4th, defender of the faith is a lot more hurtful than having to erase the character sheet of a generic 7th level paladin. In some campaigns, characters die. Deal with it.
If the DM is not giving out as much exp as you expect, then this may be something you have to grow accostomed to. A lot of DMs write a campaign, they know what level you start at, what level is appropriate to be at for the final section, and level you up accordingly to fit that trend. Maybe he wrote too long a campaign, but he doesn't want epic level characters fighting off the pesky bandits that stole 2 oxen and a goose from the local farmer. Again, deal with it - some campaigns are slower.
If the DM is 'cheating', then you should accept that most DMs cheat. Whether to move the plot along (yes, your spot check worked), to make things more interesting (you fell asleep on watch I'm afraid), to keep you alive (damn, the boss just happened to miss with all his attacks), or just to adjust stats on the fly if the encounter calls for it.
And of course, if the DM being a jerk means insulting players, picking on someone's character for personal reasons, etc, then just leave.
And above all else, decide on this. Is this DM trying to play a game where everyone can have fun? (work with him to make DMing easier for him and help) Or is he just deliberately being a jerk? (follow seven sided die's advice)