27
\$\begingroup\$

I'm soon going to be a guest player in a Pathfinder game where silliness is the theme. (The party has been drawn into the Demiplane of Dinosaurs, which is reportedly a lot like Ravenloft, except with less gothic horror and more dinosaurs.) It's hard to match the Chicken Infested flaw for sheer silliness, so I figured I'd build a character around that.

Chicken Infested (Dragon #330 87)
[Flaw]
You’ve got chickens.
Effect: Whenever you draw a weapon or pull an item out of a container, you have a 50% chance of drawing a live chicken instead. No, we don’t know where the chickens come from; it’s your character.
Note: The Dragon #330 Class Acts: Commoner column “Flaws for Commoners” says, “You must be a 1st-level commoner to take” this flaw (87).

Here are the requirements for the character:

  1. Only Pathfinder material. (I got a special dispensation for Chicken Infested itself.) Anything in the PFSRD is okay, as is anything in the core book or any of the Ultimate books. No custom races, but races and replacement features from Ultimate Races are okay. 3rd party material requires special permission; it's allowed for this question, but should be used sparingly.
  2. Builds should focus on levels 7-10. We'll be starting at level 7, and this silliness could last a couple of sessions. Suggestions for progressing past level 10 would be nice but are not necessary; likewise, playability at levels lower than 7 is not a priority.
  3. The build should take advantage of Chicken Infested as much as possible, rather than simply trying to avoid its (many) inconveniences. My assumption is that any build will revolve around Throw Anything or some similar use for an endless supply of improvised weapons, but other approaches are welcome.
  4. I'd like to be moderately competent at one (potentially) useful non-combat skill. This could be a Knowledge skill, a social skill (including Sense Motive), Perception, or Stealth. More skills is always nice but the minimum is one.
  5. Because this is a Chicken Infested build, the 1st level obviously has to be in commoner.
  6. Assume typical wealth for a 7th level character. I have no idea how much wealth will be available once we start; answers that don't rely on a flow of cash are preferred, but not required.
  7. I haven't checked with the DM for a ruling yet, so for the purposes of this question assume the chickens use the stats in the PFSRD.
\$\endgroup\$
36
\$\begingroup\$

There is only one thing scarier than a farmer with her flock of chickens... a sainted farmer, worshiper of the colonel with a flock of undead, flesh-eating chickens, here to sell you delicious chicken flesh.

This idead inspired from this thread where:

... you are going to be playing a very different character than the cleric of a death god who has to build her (usually individually less powerful) undead from available corpses but gets a multitude of them

The thing about chicken-infested is... you'll never run out of corpses.

The theory:

The build: Commoner 1/Cleric 6 (suggestions courtesy of Cirdec)

The cleric, with access to the spell Blood Money via Dreamed Secrets can cast Animate Dead for so long as her Lesser Restoration spells hold out.

Given that you could be a normal cleric animating the dinosaurs you're fighting, the DM should be OK with these 3rd party feats, so long as you agree not to reanimate the corpses of the enemies: the blessings of The Colonel are to be reserved for the blessed beasts only.

Purchase a staff of command undead for 6,400 gp, basic enchanted armor and weapons, and keep the rest in onyx. When you get low, swap your burning skeleton swarms out for bloody skeleton swarms, which allows them to respawn. (They're less effective, but present a good way of conserving cash.)

Rulings needed:

  • How do multiple fiery auras interact? How much damage should a swarm's firey aura do?
  • How many HD does a burning chicken skeleton have? Does the swarm's HD "feel right?"
  • Is it OK to take saint, in exchange for restricting its animate dead to only chicken you produce (providing you worship the undead chicken god named Colonel Five Spices?)
  • What attacks and capabilities the "swarm of undead burning chicken" have.

A hypothetical burning undead chicken swarm:

A raven to raven swarm upgrades from one raven to 1000 ravens and uses the swarm rules for attacks. For undead chickens, since they're kinda-sorta flying, I would assert that an undead burning chicken swarm has 300 members (not a problem for you), which does "Swarm: 1d6" damage:

Swarm Attack: creatures with the swarm subtype don’t make standard melee attacks. Instead, they deal automatic damage to any creature whose space they occupy at the end of their move, with no attack roll needed.

Which significantly reduces the dice rolls needed.

Adding the burning skeleton template turns the attack into Swarm: 1d6+1d6 fire, some adjudication of how fiery death works when destroying swarm creatures, and turns the entire setup into a 4 HD (+1 from burning) creature. Of which you can have 3 (24 HD effective) on the table from your animate dead bucket, and 1 non-burning swarm from your command undead feat bucket (if you can figure out how to take it as a saint -- see if some adaptation of the grace rules is appropriate.)

As a swarm, it'll take half damage from piercing and slashing weapons, as well as DR/5 bludgeoning. I honestly don't know how to calculate how many HP the swarm has. but i would assume (4d8+4 = 22), which does not a huge amount of good when a t-rex chomps on them (as the t-rex has bite which counts as all three types for purposes of overcoming damage reduction), but will at the very least provide an excellent distraction, and the 3 swarms working together can take one down in 5 rounds (due to burning aura, the fact that every bite it takes does some damage to it) or less, assuming it is a little unlucky. Which means that you plus three swarms makes for a decent but not overwhelmingly powerful party member.

Nominal build:

Captain Cayenne

Human Commoner 1/Cleric 6

Motto: "Original... OR EXTRA CRISPY?!"

  • Patron: The Outer God of Chickens and Death. The Colonel.

    • Patron's Domain: Death

    • Patron's Weapon: Falkata (Closest thing I could find to a very large butcher's knife)

Happily, we worship the outer god, known as "The Colonel." His white beard and unspeakable chicken practices force us to acknowledge him as a Great Old One. Therefore, we have the simpler build.

Feats:

  • Human Bonus: Quick Draw (needed to ... not just waste time)
  • 1: Skill Focus: Diplomacy
  • Traits: Chicken Infested, Magical Knack
  • 3: Spell Focus (Necromancy)
  • 5: Diabolical Negotiator (wisdom to diplomacy, increase more than two steps. All the better for selling "delicious, cooked from the inside, boneless chicken wings".)
  • 7: Undead Master

With undead master, we have CL11 with regards to animate dead. Giving us 5 to 11 burning chicken skeleton swarms. In combat, stick close to someone so you can use bodyguard. (If you find yourself using it more frequently to better effect, trade out diabolical negotiator for combat reflexes).

An discussion on blood money

As per Cirdec's answer, the spell Blood Money may be used instead of the saint shenanigans. Unfortunately, Blood Money is magus 1, sor/wis 1, witch 1. And the best swarm-chicken casters are clerics. Therefore, we must class the cleric as an outer god.

\$\endgroup\$
  • \$\begingroup\$ @obliviousSage Did you get the DM rulings yet? This answer will have to be significantly adjusted if saint isn't allowed. \$\endgroup\$ – Brian Ballsun-Stanton Mar 22 '15 at 23:02
  • 13
    \$\begingroup\$ This is incredibly flavorful... \$\endgroup\$ – Harmelyo Mar 23 '15 at 9:29
  • 2
    \$\begingroup\$ Extra style points for having the chickens allocated to buckets. "Animate dead bucket" should be a magic item. \$\endgroup\$ – Simon Mar 23 '15 at 22:08
  • \$\begingroup\$ This is an awesome idea. Unfortunately, using the Saint's Patron Domain to cast spell like abilities without expensive material components doesn't work until the Rich of spirit Grace is available at level 15. If you can somehow get the blood money spell it could be used to pay for the castings. The easiest way to do so is take a level of sorcerer, which I've written into an answer. We can't get blood money as a Samsaran spell because it's not on a divine spell list. \$\endgroup\$ – Cirdec Apr 14 '15 at 12:45
  • \$\begingroup\$ You can control twice as many burning swarms, since the "variants ... count as twice their normal number of Hit Dice per casting. Once controlled, they count normally against the controller's limit.". \$\endgroup\$ – Cirdec Apr 14 '15 at 12:49
14
\$\begingroup\$

Scratched, breathless, his tabard torn, the scout entered the tent. "Sire! It's too late!" he gasped. "Sir Bailus appraoches!" The king pulled his eyes away from the map spread before him, intricate 2"-high wooden figures locating upon it opposing armies of knights, wizards, and fantastic creatures. The king shook his head in despair, reached into the case containing the wooden figures, and pulled forth a wooden figure shaped like a chicken the size of a human head. With the scout's instruction, the king placed the enormous figure on the map. It sat on the faux battlefield like a last meal.

"Indeed, we are all doomed," he said

Sir Bailus

Surrounded by adoring chickens, a Tiny halfling wielding a lance rides an armored chicken.

Age 23; Height 1' 5"; Weight 4 lbs.; Hair black; Eyes brown
Initially in the care of his aunt and uncle, Bailus left the farm at age 13 to seek the witch who cursed him with chickens. She explained to him that this was a blessing and taught him their words and the words of all animals. Then she cursed him again, reducing his stature to the size of the animals he had come to despise. After some wandering, he embraced his fate, accepted as his muse the fowl Piletina, his final gift from the witch, and found his true home among his parents, minor nobles who instructed him the ways of knighthood. It was only after he, astride Piletina, and his chicken army of defeated an entire orc army that his parents sent him into the world to make his own way, his presence attracting evils wishing to harm him and the barony.

enter image description here

Sir Bailus Gonzo Vistiena, Male reduced Halfling Inspiring Commander Order of the Beast Cavalier 5 / Commoner 1 / Witch 1: CR 6; Tiny humanoid [halfling]; HD 5d10+2d6+15; hp 52; Init +4; Spd 20 ft.; AC 20, flat-footed 16, touch 14, CMD 11; base atk bonus +5, CMB +7; Atk +12 melee (1d4+4/×3, +1 agile Tiny lance); SA challenge 2/day, inspiring commands (14 round/day: inspire courage +2, inspire competence), rapid tactician 2/day, spells; SQ halfling racial traits (trading sure-footed for outrider), hex (feral speech), patron spells, spells, wild empathy (1d20+11), witch’s familiar (valet archetype chicken Piletina); SV Fort +6, Ref +6, Will +6; AL NG; Str 8, Dex 18, Con 12, Int 14, Wis 10, Cha 14.

Skills, Traits, and Feats: Acrobatics +4, Appraise +2, Bluff +15, Climb −1, Craft (all) +2, Diplomacy +9, Disguise +2, Escape Artist +4, Fly +4, Handle Animal +18, Heal +0, Intimidate +9, Knowledge (arcana) +6, Linguistics (Common, Halfling), Perform (any) +2, Perception +12, Sense Motive +0, Ride +16, Stealth +12, Survival +10 (+12 to follow tracks), Swim (Str) −1, Use Magic Device +15; Animalistic Affliction, Helpful; Chicken Infested, Escape RouteB, Fast Empathy, Mounted Combat, Ride-by Attack, Undersized Mount, Weapon Finesse.

Spells Prepared (3/2; base save DC = 12 + spell level; CL 1st): 0—detect magic, light, stabilize; 1st—adhesive spittle, bungle.

Spells Known: 0—all; 1st—adhesive spittle, bungle, darting duplicate, ear-piercing scream, strong wings.

Equipment (13 lbs. light load; 23,500 gp WBL): +1 agile Tiny lance (8,310 gp; 1.25 lbs.) with effortless lace (2,500 gp; 0 lbs.), circlet of persuasion (4,500 gp; 0 lbs.), cloak of resistance +1 (1,000 gp; 0.125 lbs.), endless bandolier (1,500 gp 0.25 lbs.), heavy load belt (2,000 gp; 0.375 lbs.) for Piletina, masterwork Tiny chain shirt barding (250 gp; 2.5 lbs.) for Piletina, wand of cure light wounds (1st-level spell at caster level 1) (50 charges) (750 gp; 0 lbs.), wand of long arm (1st-level spell at caster level 1) (50 charges) (750 gp; 0 lbs.), wand of mage armor (1st-level spell at caster level 1) (50 charges) (750 gp; 0 lbs.), wand of protection from evil (1st-level spell at caster level 1) (50 charges) (750 gp; 0 lbs.); 440 gp.

Tactics: Bailus leads his army of friendly chickens into battle. Bailus should always be using feral speech to speak to his chickens. They are friendly but know no tricks, but they should move according to his instructions. Opposing forces will struggle to charge much less approach Bailus, and making ranged attacks against him will be difficult.

He can take a move action to use the extraordinary ability rapid tactician to grant allies within 30 ft. the feat Escape Route. He takes a standard action to use the extraordinary ability inspiring commands to grant allies who can hear him a +2 morale bonus on attack rolls and a +2 morale bonus on weapon damage rolls. That's an extremely fluid flock of chickens, each slightly less dangerous than a Com1.

The chickens, I assume, will defend themselves against attacks. While it would be fantastic to get the chickens to aid another, I don't think that's going to happen, but you could totally ask. So, instead, the chickens are, essentially, foul weather under Bailus's control.

Bailus sows the clucking wind; others reap clucking whirlwind.

Out of combat, Bailus is a worthy addition to a party, if a little embarrassing, as he can use his chickens as scouts (they can report back, and he can understand them!), can aid others in their skill checks like mad (granting +6 to another's skill check), and possesses a host of useful skills because of his high Intelligence.


Notes

  • The DM may balk at any of the following issues:

    1. Gaining the benefits of effortless lace on a lance. (As per this question.)
    2. Not paying for the spells reduce person or permanency to be cast upon him.
    3. Selecting 2 race traits: "When selecting traits, you may not select more than one from the same list of traits...." (I know, right?) (If need be, resolve this by taking the combat trait Helpful instead of the race trait of the same name.)
    4. The chicken not being listed as an available familiar for the witch specifically. (This can't be a balance issue.)
    5. Using the endless bandolier to carry full-size items. (It was the only extradimensional space I found that used a magic item slot thus resizing with the wearer.)
  • Magic garments resize to the wearer; other magic items don't. But weight specifically goes unmentioned. If magic items retain constant weights despite new sizes, that would be dumb, but ask the DM.

  • If all squares within 30 ft. of the character are filled with Tiny creatures that's, I think, over 400 Tiny creatures.
  • The character can take a standard action via the feat Fast Empathy to take 10 on a wild empathy check to make friendly an indifferent animal with a Charisma score of at most 13 (e.g. a chicken).
  • The character can take a move action to use the extraordinary ability rapid tactician to grant for 5 round allies within 30 ft. the feat Escape Route, which says

    An ally who also has this feat provokes no attacks of opportunity for moving through squares adjacent to you or within your space.

    This feat enormously unclear. It should allow hordes of crowd-surfing chickens because the Rules for Big and Little Creatures in Combat says

    A Fine, Diminutive, or Tiny creature can move into or through an occupied square. The creature provokes attacks of opportunity when doing so.

    But whether moving through includes moving into is up to the GM. It's also really weird when both rider and ridden have the feat, as is the case here. (I recommend the GM allows the Tiny creature to move into but treat rider and ridden as a single entity.)

  • Piletina's carrying capacity is but 15 lbs. with the heavy load belt. Bailus himself weighs 4 lbs., Piletina's armor weighs 2.5 lbs. Managing that last 8.5 lbs. is really important.

  • Tactically, it will be useful if Bailus can give simple orders to his chicken forces like Wait and Go there so he can get the clear path required to charge to use feat Ride-by Attack. This may mean different flocks acting on different initiative counts. Yes, this may get flocking confusing.

\$\endgroup\$
3
\$\begingroup\$

the colonel demands you lead your flock of undead, flesh-eating chickens, but your ancestors forgot to leave you the keys to the onyx mine

Description

You will be a Commoner 1/Tattooed Sorcerer 1/Cleric 5

Start with the traits Chicken Infested and Magical Knack, which will bring your cleric caster level up to 7. Mage's Tattoo will increase the caster level of your necromancy spells by 1. The Undead Master feat will then increase the cleric's level for the purpose of animate dead and command undead (the feat) by 4.

I assume you will be summoning 3HD burning skeleton chicken swarms (see below). For the purpose of animating them, the burning chicken swarms cost 6HD, but only count as 3HD towards your limit controlling them. Summoning each swarm requires an onyx gem costing 150gp.

The bloody and burning skeleton variants are created using the animate dead spell, but count as twice their normal number of Hit Dice per casting. Once controlled, they count normally against the controller's limit.

Animate dead will allow you to animate up to 2HD/level in a single casting and control up to 4HD/level. This means you can animate 24HD or 4 swarms in a single casting. You can control 48HD or 16 swarms. A casting that summons 4 swarms will cost 600gp in materials. (You can summon twice as many swarms at a time if you first cast desecrate).

You will pay for the swarms with your own blood. Cast blood money using a first level sorcerer spell slot then cast animate dead in the same round. Blood money will deal 1d6 of damage for the first 3 swarms summoned and 1 strength damage for each whole 500gp in the price (about every 3 swarms summoned after that).

At 7th level you can control 16 swarms. At 8th level you will be able to control 17 swarms. At 9th level you will be able to control 18 swarms. At 10th level you will be able to control 20 swarms.

Build

Unused Resources

  • Tattoo familiar - you can choose an animal for your tattoo familiar and even a familiar archetype. The choice should be obvious
  • Level 1 feat - You can add any one feat that could be taken by a level 1 Dhampir commoner
  • Sorcerer bloodline - You will only get the bloodline arcana
  • Sorcerer spells known: 1 first level, 4 cantrips
  • Both cleric domains - If you choose the Law (Inevitable) subdomain you will get access to command undead as a third level domain spell. Skeleton chicken swarms are immune to the command undead spell.

Advancement

  • The command undead feat would allow you to control an addition 4+cleric level Hit Dice of undead, or 3 or 4 more swarms.

Chicken Swarms

The only thing that matters about chicken swarms is how many HD they get. Everything else will be replaced by the burning skeleton template.

Comparing the rat to the rat swarm, the bat to the bat swarm, and the monkey to the monkey swarm it looks like the swarms of tiny and diminutive animals are made with 3HD.

Burning Skeleton Chicken Swarm - CR 2

NE Tiny undead (swarm)

Init +5; Senses low-light vision; Perception +0

DEFENSE

AC 12, touch 12, flat-footed 12 (+2 size)

hp 16 (3d8+3)

Fort -, Ref +2, Will +3

Defensive Abilities DR 5/bludgeoning, immunity to fire, vulnerability to cold, swarm traits (as a swarm of tiny creatures, a Burning Skeleton Chicken Swarm takes only half damage from piercing and slashing attacks)

OFFENSE

Speed 30 ft.

Melee swarm (1d6 plus 1d6 fire)

Space 10 ft.; Reach 0 ft.

STATISTICS

Str 3, Dex 13, Con -, Int -, Wis 10, Cha 12

Base Atk +2; CMB -; CMD -

Feats Improved Initiative

Fiery Aura (Ex)

Creatures adjacent to a burning skeleton take 1d6 points of fire damage at the start of their turn. Anyone striking a burning skeleton with an unarmed strike or natural attack takes 1d6 points of fire damage.

Fiery Death (Su)

A burning skeleton explodes into a burst of flame when it dies. Anyone adjacent to the skeleton when it is destroyed takes 1d6 points of fire damage. A Reflex save (DC 12) halves this damage.

\$\endgroup\$
3
\$\begingroup\$

"He he he he HA HA HA HA HA he he he, the chicken ... the chicken never had a chance"

There's nothing as personally reafirming to a kobold than slaughtering a helpless or unwitting creature. There's nothing more helpless and unwitting than a chicken in your hands.

Big Zal the Chicken Wacker

Big Zal is a kobald who is very proud of being larger than the chickens that can't seem to let him alone. He's also very proud of his 2 "shinies". Maybe he should add 2 to his name...

Big 2al likes to sneak and kill and dive around flashing his shinies then hop back up and laugh gleefully. Out of combat 2al slaughters chickens just to watch them suffer; the life winking out of their little eyes. When he gets bored with this slaughter, he like to sneak into new places, disable anything in his way. He's very proud of being able to outwit lifeless objects. He's so clever, maybe it should be in his name... When he gets in, if he can (he rarely gets the chance) he'll slaughter something without firing either of his 2 shiny revolvers. Otherwise he takes great glee in flashing and banging them around.

2al's Combat Mechanics

Between combats 2al finds a couple of chickens and slaughters them to regain his 3 grit points and 4 of his 5 Ki points.

In addition to all the ways any gunslinger can regain grit, a bushwhacker who reduces a helpless or unaware opponent to 0 hit points or fewer also regains 1 grit point.

To regain the Ki points he casts Ki Leech from a Wand of Ki Leech. (UMD +13)

... when you confirm a critical hit against a living enemy or reduce a living enemy to 0 or fewer hit points, you can steal some of that creature's ki. This replenishes 1 point of ki as long as you have at least 1 ki point in your ki pool.

His big combat trick is to turn invisible with Vanishing Trick, use the leaping shot deed as a full round action to both move and fire both of his revolvers at his full BAB. As he dives to the floor at the end of the deed he stands up as a free action using Stand Up. If he was already invisible before this turn, he uses Vanishing Trick to vanish again before moving.

You gain a +2 bonus on Acrobatics checks made to jump. As a full-round action, you can move up to your speed and make firearm attacks at your highest base attack bonus with each loaded firearm you are wielding. You can make these attacks at any point during your movement, and if you are wielding two firearms, you can make the attacks at different points during the movement. At the end of this movement, you fall prone. This deed costs 1 grit point to perform.

These attacks are currently made at +9 to hit flat footed touch AC (10+size) for 1d6 damage + 3d6 sneak attack damage each. Against medium opponents 2al only misses on a natural 1. He averages about 28 damage per round.

If 2al doesn't start killing opponents to regain grit in the first three rounds, he can spend a round moving, reloading one of his revolvers, and killing a chicken to get back a grit point. 2al can reload while holding both revolvers by juggling one revolver into his prehensile tail.

When needed, 2al can use his mutagen to get +4 Dex and +2 Natural Armor at the expense of -2 Wis.

The Build

Big 2al the Canny Chicken Wacker

CE Kobold (Prehensile Tail alternate racial trait)

AC 18, touch 15, flat-footed 14 (+1 size)

Str 7 Dex 17 Con 10 Int 12 Wis 7 Cha 16 (11/15/12/12/7/15)

Commoner 1/Pistolero Bushwacker Gunslinger 1/Ninja 4/ Vivisectionist ? Alchemist 1

Traits: Chicken Infested, _____

Feats: Dodge, Mobility, Extra Grit, Brew Potion, Throw Anything, Leaping Shot Deed

Ninja Tricks: Vanishing Trick, Rogue Talent (Stand Up)

Sneak Attack: 3d6

Other: mutagen, poison use, ki pool, no trace +1, uncanny dodge

Deeds: Up Close and Deadly, Gunslinger’s Dodge, Quick Clear

Skills: UMD 7 ranks (+13)

Equipment: 2 masterwork revolvers worth 4,300gp each. 48 metal cartridges worth 15gp each. A wand of Ki Leech worth 11,250gp. Masterwork studded leather armor worth 175gp.

Unused

  • Trait
  • Alchemist extracts
  • Equipment: 2755gp. Consider buying a minor bag of holding (1000gp) or an endless bandolier (1500 gp) to stuff chickens into. The endless bandolier has two pouches each big enough to hold a 20 pound small culverin that could be used to store chickens until you can deal with them properly.
  • 46 Skill points
  • Favored class bonuses
  • Alchemist archetype - either Trapbreaker for trapfinding or Chirurgeon for inert extracts are cures.

Well armed advancements

2al's first level advancement is a big one. He takes another level of alchemist and gets the Vestigial Arm discovery. He spends about half his money on another masterwork revolver.

Dex 18

Discoveries: Vestigial Arm

Other: Either trapfinding or infused curative

Extracts: Deathwatch

Equipment: 1 more masterwork revolver worth 4,300gp each.

Big 2al is not only very proud of being larger than the chickens that can't seem to let him alone, but he's also very proud of being able to choke 3 chickens at the same time, even if he does look funny doing it.. He's very proud of his 3 "shinies". Maybe he should add 3 to his name...

3ig Zal the Canny Chick3n Wack3r's Combat Mechanics

Zal wields 3 revolvers, one in each hand, including the hand at the end of his new vestigial arm.

The arm does not give the alchemist any extra attacks or actions per round, though the arm can wield a weapon

He can fire all 3 revolvers in one full-round action with a single use of the leaping shot deed.

... As a full-round action, you can move up to your speed and make firearm attacks at your highest base attack bonus with each loaded firearm you are wielding...

These attacks are now made at +11 to hit flat footed touch AC (10+size) for 1d6 damage + 3d6 sneak attack damage each. Against small opponents Zal only misses on a natural 1. He averages about 42 damage per round.

At level 9, Zal takes the Extra Discovery (Vestigial Arm) feat and buys another masterwork or better revolver.

3ig Zal is extremely proud that he can now choke 4 chickens at the same time. He's also very proud of his 4 "shinies". Maybe he should add 4 to his name... Oh, and he has 4 arms. He has 4 forearms too... He he. 4 forearms.

Without considering anything else he gets at level 9, he's now averaging 56 damage per round.

Big Z4l the C4nny Chicken W4cker's Further advancement

  • The next 4 levels of gunslinger will give +4 BAB, his Dex bonus to damage, and give essentially 2d6 of sneak attack.
  • Improved critical or other expanded threat range will on average give back 1/5 grit per round.
  • When Z4l gets iterative attacks due to a high BAB he can choose in a full round action to forgo his later attacks in order to kill some chickens.
  • Z4l desperately needs to be able to change damage types and deal with damage reduction. He also needs to be able to fly.
\$\endgroup\$
  • \$\begingroup\$ I like the idea of abusing chickens as free great grit source, but unless I'm overlooking something here, this guy does 0.8 attacks per round on average, for 10.5 damage including sneak attack. \$\endgroup\$ – MrLemon Apr 15 '15 at 9:34
  • \$\begingroup\$ @MrLemon Where do you get 0.8 attacks per round? It's 4 attacks the first 2 rounds, and then it falls off to 4 attacks every other round if Z4l isn't dropping enemies yet. The real problem is that without sneak attack those 4 attacks are only doing on average a total of 14 damage. Z4l doesn't have a reliable way to get sneak attack damage. \$\endgroup\$ – Cirdec Apr 15 '15 at 9:39
  • \$\begingroup\$ I somehow overlooked the fact that you are using Revolvers, which drastically cuts down reloading times. \$\endgroup\$ – MrLemon Apr 15 '15 at 9:44
  • 1
    \$\begingroup\$ @MrLemon Like, since 2 weeks ago, the FAQ explains how the feat Rapid Reload affects advanced firearms. Just so you both know. \$\endgroup\$ – Hey I Can Chan Apr 15 '15 at 14:49
  • 4
    \$\begingroup\$ This is pretty entertaining, but I have concerns about accidentally drawing a chicken when I try to pull out my revolvers... \$\endgroup\$ – Oblivious Sage Apr 15 '15 at 23:07
-7
\$\begingroup\$

Alright this is going to be fun.

I recommend that rather then focusing on throwing a few chicken per turn, you move to acquire as many buffs that effect all allies within a given radius of you as possible. I don't care how many classes, magic items, or feats it takes. What you want is so that every chicken within close if not medium range of you is a CR 2 creature.

Firstly, You're going to want quick draw and a large quantity of light weight items to 'draw', as you should never be in a situation where you don't have enough chickens. Secondly, it's a good thing that Pathfinder does have chicken stats as monster. Because the fact has a stat block means that it can be subjected to buff. Thirdly, a ring of always on speak with animals and high diplomacy might be needed to urge these untrained animals to do what you want... especially attacking things, until you learn how to make them all immune to fear that is.

Learn from the cuckoo swarm because even the greatest of T-rexs will fear the onslaught of your undying swarm of death chickens

\$\endgroup\$
  • 5
    \$\begingroup\$ Can you recommend a class, feats, magic items, etc? \$\endgroup\$ – Oblivious Sage Mar 21 '15 at 18:12
  • 1
    \$\begingroup\$ If this was D&D 3.5, easily. Bard, Marshal, Dragon Shaman, Dragonfire Adept, and some forms of Paladin... Given this is a Pathfinder Question, I can only guess as to what classes, spells, or feats are best at this. \$\endgroup\$ – The Amused Muse Mar 21 '15 at 18:59
  • 3
    \$\begingroup\$ @theamusedmuse it's generally best not to guess an answer, when one is unfamiliar with the rules. \$\endgroup\$ – Pureferret Apr 15 '15 at 7:33

Your Answer

By clicking “Post Your Answer”, you agree to our terms of service, privacy policy and cookie policy

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.