How do I deal with a member of my party who attacks me whenever I cast a spell?

Question

I'm new to D&D and so are the friends I play it with.

My character is a Chaotic Evil Pact of the Tome Warlock. One of my party members is a Lawful Neutral Warrior, and in his backstory he dislikes mages because of what happened to him/his family. In total, there are four players

Whenever I use a spell in combat and he can use his mage slayer feat, he always does. (This situation stemmed from me hitting him when I critically failed). An example of this was today when I was fighting two fairly powerful monsters and taking a beating. I killed one, took an attack from the other, used my Hellish Rebuke spell to attack the monsters and then he attacked me, knocking me out for the rest of the long fight.

We haven't come across any mages that were evil or that we should have fought, so he has only been able to use his feat on me. His reason for KOing me in the fight I mentioned earlier was because I critically failed in a different fight and killed an unconscious monster that could have given our party important information.

This is largely an in character problem, although I did get a little annoyed when he knocked my character out. The other players thought we were a bit stupid to be fighting, but we sometimes mess around in character, putting each other in danger, so that was about it.

Answer 1

The first thing you need to do is figure out whether this problem needs to be resolved in-character or out-of-character. Is the warrior's player doing this because the player enjoys this kind of PvP activity? Or is he doing it because he thinks it's what his character would do?

If it's the latter, then you should take a look at My Guy Syndrome, then use the answers there to help you discuss the issue with the player. If it's the former, then you need to sit down with the player, away from the game, and ask him why he's so invested in attacking you. Explain that this isn't fun for you, and that you want to work with him to find a way to support his character's backstory without having to spend all your time unconscious and not participating in the game.

For example, in my current game, my character and another character don't get along (though the player and I are good friends). My character frequently "attacks" the other character, but those events are strictly roleplay - no dice are rolled and there's no in-game effect, just a fun interaction. Another possibility would be to have a third character get involved, someone the warrior respects. This third character could say to the warrior, "I know you hate mages, but we need the warlock to accomplish our goal. If you keep knocking them out in combat, you're putting the rest of us at risk." Roleplay solutions like these help the player feel like their backstory and RP choices are being respected, without negatively affecting other players' characters.

A few key points to keep in mind when having that discussion: RPGs are supposed to be fun for everyone involved, and the whole group is responsible for maintaining that fun. If this player's actions are preventing you from having fun, that's not fair to you (and potentially the other players, as one frustrated and upset player can often bring down the whole group's mood, however unintentionally).

Depending on the player's reaction to this discussion, you may need to get your DM involved. Talk to your DM privately (not with the warrior's player present, to avoid anyone getting ganged up on), and explain the situation and why it's frustrating to you. Ask the DM if they can do anything to mitigate the issue - perhaps to enforce these attacks as roleplay-only, or to help give a story reason for the warrior to stop attacking you.

TL;DR: Make sure My Guy Syndrome isn't the issue, then work with the player to find alternate ways to RP their character that don't negatively affect you.

Answer 2

As a player that started playing last year, I think I can offer my fresh perspective on being a new player. The same sort of things happened.

Talk to each other

One of the things you're going to have to learn to do is to talk to each other about what you want to do (including your DM). Your post suggests that you find his actions to be a problem. How can he know this is a problem if you don't talk to him? Exploring the possibilities of DnD is a very VERY natural reaction when you start playing. I think this is somewhat healthy and sort of expected of you. But, maybe you're over that phase now and you want to move forward as a cohesive group. Maybe he still wants to attack you because it's fun. Use your words! Have a discussion about what you want to do.

What about our characters?

So you've invested some time into your characters and you probably don't want to change them. You might have to, and it might not be as bad as you think. Of course, maybe you don't have to! Read up on "My Guy" Syndrome, it is highly recommended.

You need to find a reason for your party to be together. If you find a reason, then you have a way to reconcile your differences to work towards a common goal. Are you trying to stop the end of the world? Well then, your evil character and his character probably have a reason to work together to prevent their own destruction. Are you in it for some reward? Maybe you won't put up with much before the risk outweighs the reward. This is why you need to decide as a group what you want to do. If you don't reconcile your differences, your characters are at risk of leaving the party, realistically. Of course, you can always ignore the "realistic" thing and just continue to mess around, but it sounds like you don't want this. And remember, Chaotic Evil does not mean Chaotic Dick. (The linked answer is more relevant than the question)

If all else fails...

Maybe you guys should fight. This can be fun and cathartic. It can also help get grievances out in the open. Just be careful that this doesn't explode into real life. The fight can be a good role-playing exercise. This could also satisfy his need to fight you. I'd discuss this with the DM so you know what his expectations are for the fight, because he might let one of you kill the other.

Next campaign...

Before you start playing, you should build characters together, backstory and all. This is actually really fun, and helps build better characters. Do you know eachother? Are your histories linked at all? Is there a secret one of you knows about the other? You can avoid party-conflict (if you want) this way.

Answer 3

If you think about it, why would two such characters be going on an adventure together?

=> Exactly, two such characters wouldn't go adventuring together.

So, the real problem is that four players have created characters without thinking why those characters would form a group.

So, if the other player wants to play his character as he does, the best solution would be that your character leaves the group and you build a character more suitable for the group.

Or you and the other player have to work out an agreement how you want to play together. Your characters don't have to like each other, but in an adventuring group you should be able to have a little trust in your fellow adventurers.

Answer 4

Since your character is chaotic evil, just duke it out with the guy? Killing someone of annoyance is quite alright for an evil character.

Answer 5

As some of the answers have pointed out, your two characters don't seem to be compatible. There will be many conflicts, and though it might be fun at times, it could also prove devastating.
If you decide that the best solution is to have on of you change characters, then I might recommend taking the following approach to the character switch:

Duke it Out
You could approach the other player, and ask him if he would be OK with a role-played fight between your two characters. You would decide if the fight became a fight to the death, or a fight till supremacy, where the looser would be driven away. You can then figure out the details of how/when to initiate the duel/conflict, and have a good time hacking/blasting each other to pieces. I personally think that this could do for a great/fun roleplay session, assuming both of you are OK with it, and don't mind (too much) if your character is the one who dies/leaves. Whichever player looses his character would then be able to create a new character who (hopefully) won't have similar issues with the other's character.

Edit: Thanks to 'Hey I Can Chan' for pointing out that the fight doesn't have too be a fight to the death.