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Whenever I run social encounters beyond simple intrigues in Song of Ice and Fire I either feel like I've abandoned the rules all together or the running step by step nature makes the exchange feel stilted, forced, and just too much like a gamification of rp interation. It feels locked down and the specifics of the mechanics make only certain choices of phrase viable, not just certain meta tactics. When simulating combat in any realistic fashion this feel necessary and not an undue burden, but when I run social scenes with it it seems to take the life out of the RP and the encounter in general.

Generally what happens is my players will get 1 or 2 phrases to say and then either the next person in order will talk, instead of the person who should respond. If the person does respond, their response doe not always fit the mechanics of the next person who goes. In general it doesn't flow as a conversation naturally does. Am I missing something or is this simply part and parcel of the mechanics?

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Let them talk

A good way of handling the RP during an Intrigue is let the players play, having the conversation as natural as it can, argue against their opponents and then, as soon you feel both sides have "used their attacks", let them roll at this point, and describe the psychological effects of the results on both sides of the combat, such as emotions, reasonings, insights.
Of course, this way of handling the Intrigue scene can become a little "messy", especially if one side of the Intrigue has a lot of people talking (the PCs, for example), or can be seen as a moment without following the rules, but it can transform an Intrigue into a good scene based on the characters in action.

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