233

These people are toxic. You don't need to resist them in-game, you need to leave. He makes a point of it by calling me 'it' in real life, as, according to him, my unusual name isn't really a name and as such it isn't worth addressing me by. This is just proof that you're not going to be respected at all.


184

You have more power than you think. Set boundaries in advance, and establish the consequences for violation. Don't be afraid to walk out if harm is occurring. Discuss your concerns before game play, and test them in a limited fashion with collaborative character creation. You assert: "I'm interested in playing with this group because I'm very close to the ...


169

The players you have described sound horrific. D&D can be a great game, but any game could be spoiled by players like these. Avoiding the game entirely, as Rylee Fowler suggests, is the safest solution. Still, if you definitely want to play this game anyway, proceed with caution. Start by speaking to the DM about your concerns. You know your DM well, so ...


131

I had a quick look around because I felt sure this would have been asked before but I can't find anything that would qualify as a duplicate. Short answer - go for it. I started playing in 1980 with a group of friends none of whom had ever seen or heard of a game anything like D&D. We made it up as we went along, had lots of fun and some of us still do. ...


131

No, that's not how rage works. Murdering random rabbits does not fuel rage. A barbarian's rage works as follows: It ends early if you are knocked unconscious or if your turn ends and you haven't attacked a hostile creature since your last turn or taken damage since then. First of all, if you're carrying rabbits around and treating them nicely, then the ...


129

Since I started DMing D&D a long, long time ago, I found that the dynamics of a mixed group of male ande female players is a tad different from a one-sex only group of players. This is purely anecdotal, however, and fruit of my own experiences and by no means is representative of the general gamer population. Note that, for the purposes of the ...


127

"Excuse me. Please be quiet. I haven't finished speaking, when I have you can talk as much as you want." This isn't a game problem, its a manners problem.


126

Don't play with people who make you uncomfortable. The fundamental issue is that the group has a couple meanie-face jerkheads (feel free to insert a much more vitriolic phrase of your choosing) who everyone else is tolerating. These players are engaging in abusive, toxic behavior. This is bad in any context. Games are supposed to be fun, and playing with ...


109

Absolutely Here's the bare minimum you need to successfully join the roleplaying hobby: At least one other willing person Mutual communication That's it, full stop. The complexity and bar to entry into RPGs don't have to be high — as evidence, I give you any five year old I've ever met. Seriously, the way children develop social skills is through social ...


101

In game It is not an in-game problem. It needs to be solved out of game… Well, kinda. Her character being weaker might mean that she is over compensating and solution to this problem here. Meta game Having been in several situations not too dissimilar to yours, both within RPG and outside, group dynamic issues are almost always dealt best by talking to ...


87

Guide him to a simpler class, or lay down the law It sounds like your problem-player has a lot of faults: he is disorganized, forgetful, and not really invested in learning the rules of this game. But it also sounds like he has a lot of strengths: he is great at role playing, and genuinely invested in the group's progress (I'm guessing based on their out-of-...


78

When I had a new player start playing with us about 6 months ago, she had this exact problem. My solution was two-fold. Reduce the number of options She wanted to play a druid, so there were lots of spells to pick from. So I reduced the spell list from 7 cantrips and 16 level 1 spells to a list of 3 cantrips and 6 spells (1st level druids pick 2 and 4 ...


77

Since you asked for anecdotes: I had a pre-teen player join my table once (he was the son of one of the other players) and his character concept was just a mary-sue as you fear. He basically wanted to be Raistlin the Tiamat killer on session one. So my challenge then was to find a way to mold expectations for this character concept so that he still ...


76

Short answer: really, practice is the only answer It's like any kind of memorization task, eventually you're going to get it, and you'll have trouble until then. But there are ways to make the memorization easier. You are going to have to correct them sometimes. Don't think of that as a failure. Just make the correction and move on. Don't default to ...


75

I would simply run the current campaign to a quick but satisfying conclusion, then reform the group under a new campaign without the difficult player. I've done this several times in real life with no hurt feelings. If this is all online, it's even easier. I wouldn't attempt to 'have a sit down' with this player and talk about it. Just move on. They found ...


74

You've tried talking to them, but that didn't help. Try to improve how you describe the scene instead. You say they talk over you when you narrate how an enemy is close by? So narrate that last... Theangrygm has an excellent article about how to narrate your surroundings (trigger warning: theangrygm link. May contain swearing and wishfully bashing players ...


72

Yes, you should boost their character level Heterogeneous parties don't work very well in DnD. The game is designed around the whole party being roughly the same level. When you give the new player a level 1 character, they will be handicapped not just because they lack experience with the game rules but also because their character is less powerful. That ...


72

The Sword of Teamwork and The Hammer of Not Bickering Your party is in the middle of a classic movie plot, where the team has an initial setback caused by a failure to work together effectively. Take heart that these stories have happy endings. Real feelings come first Your players seem to be really sniping at each other, and you want to make sure there are ...


71

The Fighter is a simple, easy to play class The Fighter is traditionally the simplest class available in D&D, which holds true in 5th edition. It is generally well suited to new players as it's tough and survivable, and it rewards a simple playstyle of the "go over there and hit that thing!" variety. Compared to other classes, it has only a few ...


68

Separate in character quick thinking from out of character quick thinking. Players, especially new ones, should get some time to think about what they are going to do. They should even get time to talk to the DM, maybe roll dice (like knowledge checks) to determine things they know about the situation. It's not really fair to pressure the player into making ...


65

"So, what's everyone's hobby?" John asked that evening, opening a beer. "I love gardening," Kyle said. "I'm into assassinations." Nick was apparently trying to be funny, again. Making a face even. Nobody laughed. "I play roleplaying games," Zora said. Some started chuckling about that. "No, I don't mean the leather and whips and French maids stuff you're ...


64

If some of the other answers don't let you figure out the root of the problem and get him more involved in the non-roleplay segments, that's fine. Roll with it. As long as he has a sense of humour it'll be fine. I've shared a table with many an odd duck, and if they don't fit the game, but you want to keep them around, then you fit the game to them. ...


63

You're not having fun. Since the entire point of role-playing is to have fun, you need to do something about it. In particular, it sounds like the character he's playing (called a GMPC) is seriously distracting him from his GM task of running a fun story for the other players at the table. You have several options, depending on whether you're willing to ...


61

No 4th Edition and 5th Edition are completely different versions of D&D, and share very little in terms of rules and mechanics. If you're looking to learn 5th Edition, I suggest you start with the freely available D&D Basic Rules, which include almost all of the game's rules, but only a small subset of character creation options.


61

As these are all new players, there's nothing wrong with a bit of "out-of-game" DM guidance at these early stages. After describing the situation you can simply say: "What you do now is your choice. You can attempt to calm the situation, shout at the attackers, fetch help, attack or something else!" Then ask each player: What do you do? You can even ...


60

Your players are telling you that they might not want to adventure. First and foremost, ask your players if this is the case before acting on advice from random strangers on the internet. It appears to me that they are not interested in playing in an adventure, and that is perfectly fine. There are many other options for the kinds of games to run. The ...


58

One option I have tried with success is to leave as many choices as possible out of initial character creation, only making them when they become relevant in the game. This gets you into the action much quicker, the delay of which is likely a major reason your players are sick of character creation. For example, I never ask players to decide in advance what ...


56

Best way to learn is to do, in my experience. I've DMed for a number of groups that have never played before (with players from age 11 to age 56(!!)), and in my experience, they really struggle to understand the game until they play it. Step one is to get everyone a character sheet-- if they're really lost, make one for them, or get a pre-made one from ...


54

I recommend not forcing your players to draw maps From everything I have experienced with players new and old, having players make the maps doesn't work well and I would recommend not doing it at your table without careful consideration and good reason. When making any change to your game, you should consider and be clear on at least a few things: What is ...


52

Flat out tell them (as GM) that the best debriefing possible, after the mission has inevitably failed, is to blame the failure (likely, multiple failures) on the treasons of dead teammates who aren't there to defend themselves. Have a secret society order one PC to kill another, or to frame then kill them. If they don't do it, have their own secret society ...


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