Hot answers tagged

312

It's pretty reasonable you're annoyed. One of your fellow players secretly plotted to kill your character for revenge (and it worked), the DM - the one guy you pretty much have to be able to trust - was in on it, and your fellow players offered you no emotional support at a point when you clearly needed it and instead made things worse for you. People have ...


226

These people are toxic. You don't need to resist them in-game, you need to leave. He makes a point of it by calling me 'it' in real life, as, according to him, my unusual name isn't really a name and as such it isn't worth addressing me by. This is just proof that you're not going to be respected at all.


183

You have more power than you think. Set boundaries in advance, and establish the consequences for violation. Don't be afraid to walk out if harm is occurring. Discuss your concerns before game play, and test them in a limited fashion with collaborative character creation. You assert: "I'm interested in playing with this group because I'm very close to the ...


165

The players you have described sound horrific. D&D can be a great game, but any game could be spoiled by players like these. Avoiding the game entirely, as Rylee Fowler suggests, is the safest solution. Still, if you definitely want to play this game anyway, proceed with caution. Start by speaking to the DM about your concerns. You know your DM well, so ...


144

A DM should not think of himself as having the right of Rule 0, which is why he controls the game. A DM should instead think of himself as having the responsibility of controling the game, and therefore being given the tool of Rule 0 in order to do so. Because ultimately, that is what Rule 0 is: a tool given to the DM to keep the game fun, engaging, and ...


136

Find better friend(s) From what you said, Bob is an obnoxious toxic character. Do not role play with him and ditch him as a friend. The rest of the players are bad friends for not standing up for OP, although it could be excused. Life is too short to waste on this. I get that you want revenge but really it is not worth it. Act like the grown up in the ...


131

First, you're off the hook for "My Guy" syndrome - this is clearly a conflict the GM orchestrated. "My Guy" happens when a player decides to use his character to justify derailing the plot, but telling you that your lost love is working with the enemy means that this is the plot. You're being presented with a genuine challenge that hinges on your buy-in of ...


123

Don't play with people who make you uncomfortable. The fundamental issue is that the group has a couple meanie-face jerkheads (feel free to insert a much more vitriolic phrase of your choosing) who everyone else is tolerating. These players are engaging in abusive, toxic behavior. This is bad in any context. Games are supposed to be fun, and playing with ...


119

The class played doesn’t matter, and arguing about it only hurts your position This situation really, really wouldn’t be any better if she was playing a sorcerer. If she ignores her prepared spells, why wouldn’t she also ignore her known spells? You imagine that it will be easier for you to keep a sorcerer in line because it will be easier for you to keep ...


116

The obvious solution would be to go to the authorities (the city guard?) with your evidence. They're certainly searching for the villain who burned down all those inns and killed all those people. Come back with twenty or thirty NPC archers and shoot him full of arrows. If you try doing this, you're going to have two problems. The first problem is that ...


108

[Note: When I wrote this answer, the detail about attempted sexual assault was not part of the question. If the mods allow, I'd like this answer to stand as is with the caveat that my answer below ignores that detail. However, my answer to the separate question addresses that detail.] I have experienced a similar problem to yours (though it is far in my ...


99

The limit to Rule Zero is what the players are willing to accept. It's that simple. Unless you can convince him to change what he's doing, your only option is to walk away.


99

Yes. You should leave. These people are not respectful, and are not worth your time. Tell your brother you're not interested, and stop joining the call — he's the only person you have actual contact with, and given the behaviour of the rest of the group you're best cutting ties with them completely. (Who would want friends like that?) You could ...


93

Make the townsfolk afraid of them, too. In short: have the NPCs react like real people. It's a small town. People talk. People are going to notice the destroyed door, and others may have been drawn to the ruckus and seen/overheard what happened. Then the rumor mill got to spinning. See, in this case... So...in rolls this band of strangers, wipes out ...


87

Use a Rolling Tray I don't want to accuse someone of cheating if they were not, but I also don't want cheating to continue if it is in fact occurring Since another player has already mentioned it, your simple solution is to use "a rolling tray" or something similar. Any roll that does not land on the rolling tray does not count. What is a rolling ...


83

Disclaimer: After some concerns regarding copyright, I felt a bit bad about the previous images I was using. I replaced it by one I made with using PowerPoint and crayons. This looks like a job for a good set of props! Let her roll a wizard, but spice things up a bit so that preparing spells becomes less of a chore. From my experience, most of the time ...


77

It sounds like your fellow roleplayer just wants you to be verbally clear about what exactly you're doing mechanically without just pointing to a thing on your character sheet. It doesn't sound like their problem is that you're roleplaying at all—I'd be pretty surprised if they disliked flavourful descriptions of how people do things. It's pretty easy to ...


73

I'm going to take a radical position and suggest that eight hours is a long time to roleplay without a break from playing a role in any case, and that the meal-as-a-break may actually be a welcome respite for some players. For some people roleplaying can actually be hard mental work (or for some kinds of people it can be mildly stressful, if enjoyable); ...


71

Oh. Oh my. This is a pretty difficult situation for everyone involved. Let's not sugar-coat it more than we must: you made some profoundly poor decisions in play. For your own benefit, you really need to figure out how that happened. Why did you feel like sexual coercion was a reasonably obstacle to throw in front of the group trying to fulfill their ...


71

I'm trained in conducting faith-based lessons for children focused on morality and virtues, in facilitating spiritual empowerment programs for junior youth, and in tutoring youth engaged in service-oriented community activities (this last one is my specialty). In both religious and non-religious contexts I've used role-playing as a forum for exploring ...


71

"My Guy" syndrome is often misused as a term. It's when following your idea of your character's persona creates insurmountable problems for the game, usually exacerbated by the GM being a weenie and not just saying "Well, since your PC moved to Montana while everyone else is fighting vampires in Chicago - you're going to have to roll a new character to get ...


68

Have a discussion with the player, privately and not during game time. Acknowledge you invited him without discussing what the groups expectations of him were. Try to have the missing discussion with him. In the discussion point out how his current play style does not fit the groups desired play style. At the end of the discussion ask him to conform to the ...


66

You may be encountering My Guy Syndrome. There is a fine line between role playing in depth and falling into "My Guy Syndrome" where the cooperative fun at the table between players is influenced in a negative way. This may be what your DM is concerned about. Review what is at the link regarding the My Guy Syndrome and see if it applies to how the play ...


66

There is no universal 'Problem Player' What might be a problem at my table may not be a problem at yours. The same goes for different games, as well as different systems (the expected play in DnD is very different than the expected play in Paranoia for example). Thus we can't lay out a list and say "If you are doing x, y, or z, then you are creating a ...


65

"So, what's everyone's hobby?" John asked that evening, opening a beer. "I love gardening," Kyle said. "I'm into assassinations." Nick was apparently trying to be funny, again. Making a face even. Nobody laughed. "I play roleplaying games," Zora said. Some started chuckling about that. "No, I don't mean the leather and whips and French maids stuff you're ...


63

You're not having fun. Since the entire point of role-playing is to have fun, you need to do something about it. In particular, it sounds like the character he's playing (called a GMPC) is seriously distracting him from his GM task of running a fun story for the other players at the table. You have several options, depending on whether you're willing to ...


60

Ask more generally about their comfort boundaries Tell the party that you have some ideas you think might be crossing the line, and ask them where they'd like the line to be drawn. In that context you might even give examples and include something similar to your idea as just one of several. Throw in a scaled-down version as a test Use the general concept ...


59

Talk to your players Seriously. This is the very first step. Do not accuse anyone, just talk. There may be many reasons for cheating on dice: Failed roll ruined otherwise good plan that had 90% chances of success and player is afraid of it happening again. Character is weaker than the group and character (or worse, player) was ridiculed for this. Player ...


58

Explain to him that "NPC" is not a derrogatory term It seems to me you're already trying to do exactly this. You are, of course, entirely correct in that "NPC" means "Non-player-character". However, it seems your DM simply thinks that an "NPC" is any 'side-character'. Tell him that this is not the case. NPC's can be very important to the story, and can ...


57

You have two problems: an agency problem and a knowledge problem. Agency The likely reason why your players weren't all happy with the outcome of the situation you describe is because you took away their agency. Generally speaking in D&D, the players' expectations is that they control their characters, not the DM. By taking a suggestion from one player ...


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